Posts Tagged ‘dating’

Breaking Up Had Never Been Easier

December 27, 2007

Thanks to you no longer have to put any real thought into the breakup conversation.  It’s as simple as checking the appropriate boxes and an email is generated and ready to be delivered.  There are even clever sign off lines such as “I hope maggots devour your testicles” and “I won’t miss your ugly face” to really go out with a bang.  So head on over, end things in the most painless way possible (for you anyway), and enjoy your new singleness.


The Between Boyfriends Book

December 18, 2007

…is what I am currently reading. Over the weekend my cousin and I were talking about being single (as we both currently are), boys (naturally), and this book (witty essays by a Sex and the City writer). I would read aloud an excerpt and we would talk about it, laugh, draw a conclusion, and read the author’s solution.

An excerpt of note dealing with juggling a few guys at once: “Use nicknames for easy reference. If you’re having trouble keeping your love life straight, imagine how your friends feel.”

What amazes me is that my friends have been doing this for a long time now because, well, it IS hard to keep other people’s love lives straight. I’ve found the easiest to remember are those referenced by a country, personality trait, or person of fame. My favorite nicknames to date include: Jesus, Columbia, Princess, Diva, Israel, and Matt 1 (of 2 or 3, I can never remember). And, yes, these were all references to men.

Lesson of the day? Boys, we will pick you apart and pare you down better than the best of apple corers. Beware.

*Update* I forgot Tinkerbell. That is by far the best nickname. (Thanks for reminding me, Sarah.)